I received my ukulele for my birthday last year, which means I’ve been playing for about a year now. In that time I’ve gone from strumming my first simple chords to fingerpicking some pretty complex melodies. A year with the ukulele has taught me more than some songs, though. It’s changed the way I think about music and myself.

People Can (And Will) Be Sexist About Anything

It doesn’t take much Googling ukulele stuff to find people talking condescendingly about the young women who have happily adopted the uke as their instrument of choice and perform fun covers on YouTube, making fun of them for being cute and quirky, and subsequently dismissing the ukulele as a serious instrument. I occasionally find myself embarrassed when telling people that I play the ukulele, not wanting to be lumped in with what is seen as some cutesy trend.

To anyone who has engaged in this crap, I’ll say a few things:

1. It’s pretty fun to be cute and quirky. Don’t knock it until you’ve tried it.
2. You’re being sexist. “Quirky is a thinly disguised usually-gendered complement-insult. It’s used as a way to simultaneously be attracted to someone and patronize them.
3. You’re being sexist. Dismissing women for doing “easy” things is bullshit. You can pick up on the basics of uke quickly, it’s true, but many of the women sharing videos are incredibly talented.
4. You’re being sexist. After learning a few basic chords, playing the ukulele is at least as complicated as playing power chords on a guitar, and I don’t see nearly as much genderized critique of the punk bros doing that.
5.  You’re being sexist. Dismissing a whole instrument because it’s seen as being associated with a certain gender just shows how rigid you are about stupid gender roles. Get over it. Or don’t. You’re missing out.

Annnnnyway. Moving on from my rant.

There Doesn’t Have to Be An Endgame

When I played instruments as a teenager, it was always about getting somewhere. Perfecting the solo for jazz band. Forming a band with friends and playing shows. It was always about playing for other people. Maybe it’s just the difference between being a teenager and being an adult, but I practice the ukulele for its own sake now. It’s like I finally get the inherent value of making music, which has helped me understand the advice I’ve read about writing for writing’s sake more deeply. If I play for or with other people now, it’s to enjoy it in the moment. I like learning hard songs just for the satisfaction of it, not because I plan to put on a show or become a YouTube sensation. It’s pretty cool to have a hobby that I enjoy just because it’s fun and it makes me strive for that with writing and my other interests too.

It’s All About Family

I got into ukulele because my mom and stepdad started playing and they were having such a good time with it. Now, when they visit, playing with them is the best! It’s so great sharing a passion with my mom, talking about what we’re working on, sending each other chords for songs. I’ve got the kids in on it too, and it’s amazing when they jam with me on shakers and kazoos! Playing music as a family is seriously one of the best things I can imagine.

This next year, I’d like to play uke at a strum. I’m sure the energy of playing with a group of people is fantastic. I plan on working more on my fingerpicking and on my ability to improvise. This instrument has brought me closer to the joy of music for music’s sake and I’m so thankful.

Do you play an instrument? What does it mean to you? Tell me in the comments!